-The Canadian-

I met a guy the other day whose name is Jim
To wish him ill I guess would be a sin
But I hope his knees explode and the rain gets up his nose
Coz the girl who was with me is now with him

Now Jim is suave and handsome, tall and slim
So I'd like to tear him 'gently' limb from limb
When she next presents him roses, I'll fill them with high explosives
So they go bang and he'll be deafened by the din

When I see them close together hand in hand
I figure this is not quite what I planned
So I'll set his house on fire and dance round the blazing pyre
Then put an offer in to buy his land

If his car should cease to work then please dont tell
Him I put sugar in the tank, it heats so well
With a resulting conflagration, free fireworks for the nation
And a caramelised car that he can't sell

Hhhhmmmm!!!!!

With my expletives all deleted I hope that you
Will be happy - oh but yes I really do
As you walk through life together with hearts as one (or whatsoever)
I'll keep away..... but bid a sad adieu