Chapter 50

Goodbye Phuket?:

According to some soothsayer or other today is the day when Phuket will cease to exist.
It will sink beneath the waves never to reappear. I await this event with some minor trepidation. Quite a lot of my more superstitious local friends have actually gone home to the safety of Bangkok or their Issan farmlands.
Frankly I can’t rake up the enthusiasm for such a trip. It must be said that in the last couple of weeks there have been several earth tremors here of a minor nature but no more than I have felt in England. The major earthquake which disrupted the ocean floor causing the 2004 tsunami was repeated in the same location but as the movement was mostly lateral and not vertical the resulting tsunami had a magnitude of only about ten centimetres.
Well we shall have to just wait and see - we are all either doomed - or we are not.

Meanwhile in my local bar I have been intrigued by the antics of a German visitor. He is forty one years old and is here for just two weeks. He is on holiday and we hope he enjoys his stay. In my bar he met a Thai girl on his first day here and has been pursuing, for want of a better word, her ever since. She, I think, finds him mildly interesting but is irritated by his lack of English. “Khun Reb please teach him English. He makes me cross because he does not listen to me.” This is of course more than I can achieve in the limited time available.
Last night she phoned him to say she was tired and “not coming out to play” - or words to that effect.
Our German friend went ballistic. “I give her only one more chance. She treat me like a monkey. I not a monkey. I a clever man. I run business. I earn good money- I from master race.” Oops sorry. I made that last bit up. But the general tone was one of affronted dignity - as though she should respect him because of who he was.

Now this irritates me. Who is he anyway?

He is a man who comes on a two week holiday - finds a woman - spends a night with her and expects her gratitude.
No, my friend, that is not how it works.
Look at it from her perspective.
She is a lady who has recently split up from a farang compared to whom I ,certainly, and you, probably, are very poor men. She has been hurt as so often happens here. When people are hurt they kick as you yourself demonstrated last night.
She has been hurt and it will take a lot of sympathetic understanding before she will be able to cope with another farang.
Meeting her one day and jumping into bed with her the next is nothing to be proud of.
Do you really expect her to respect you for this? Do you expect her gratitude? To her you are just another farang who wants sex.
What makes you so special?
Ok so it happens - I guess we’ve all done it - but I suggest that far from she treating you like a monkey you are doing that to her.
She is a vulnerable hurting human being and you cheerfully leap into bed with her demonstrating a complete lack of care for her feelings and sensibilities.
Back in Germany how often do you leap into bed with a woman who you have only just met?
Call me old fashioned but it is not usually a good start to a happy meaningful relationship.

You were offended last night when I suggested that your anger was testosterone fuelled.
Not diplomatic of me I admit but, in the cold light of day, just think about it.

And then ask yourself, “ Who is the monkey?”