Chapter 71

Waiting at K.L.:


So here I am at KL airport waiting for a plane to take me home to England..
My season in Phuket is over.
So how was it for me?.
Well to be honest it has been a bit of an emotional roller coaster. I have tried hard to remember the adage about the inadvisability of falling in love in Thailand but these things just seem to happen to me..
Lack of moral fibre or something I guess..
Anyway I started the season with strong emotional attachments to two beautiful ladies and I have ended up with one happily attached to (even I have to admit) an excellent Canadian guy and the other associated with a guy who does not rate highly on my desirability scale.
Of course I am jealous in both cases. But I really am happy in the former case since the lady in question will I think be a very suitable partner for our Canadian friend.
In the second case I am just extremely exasperated because I reckon that, though she claims to be happy at the moment, and there is no way that I wish to spoil that for her, medium to long term I think it will be a disaster.
However, I have to tell myself that it is none of my damned business, which I guess it isn't really, and ignore it.

Last week, in the space of two days, I was told,by three different Thai ladies that I "talk too much".
By Thai standards I certainly do, but it occured to me, about then, that I do by English standards as well.
Actually I've always known that but I really do have an inquisitive mind - I really want to understand what is going on in the world. I think the most annoying thing about dying, for me, would be that I will not be able to find out what happens the next day. I love understanding things - any things - why people think capitalism is good despite the fact that it relies on the ludicrous premise that the economy can expand forever, why do people invariably lie about things, like when they met their present partner, always after - not before splitting up with their previous one. - how did dinosaurs turn into birds - why can't I solve Fermat's last theorum - why didn't I realize a long time ago that the world runs on emotions, not logic- why do all religions corrupt into big businesses (see previous point ).
The list is literally endless

I would contend that getting things wrong is the best way of eventually getting things right. But so many people are terrified of being wrong, as though it was a sign of humiliating weakness. It is not. It is the sign of a lively enquiring mind.

I remember a few years I was pontificating about flint. I was telling my companions around a well stocked dining table that flint is metamorphosed chalk - a deduction I must have made many year ago from the fact that it always found embedded in chalk.
One of my companions pointed out to me that I was completely wrong. Flint is , in fact, calcium silicate - hmmm!I'd never thought of that. So ok I was wrong but now I know what flint is and that's good by me. So where is the problem? I was wrong, but I didn't find it humiliating. In fact I was delighted to have had one of my errors corrected. I had learned something - this is always good.

Now where was I?

Oh yes "how was it for me?"
Well ,of course, I bought my bar towards the end of the season. This is probably a negative investment, financially. But how could I let it close? Where would I spend my evenings? There are many bars in Bangtao but none which has the ambiance of this bar. No bar-girls, no television, just a place where friends, new and old, could talk and drink. I just hope that it doesn't cost me too much.
At least it gives me the excuse to go back to Bangtao in the middle of the summer to make sure everything is going ok.
I look forward to it!